When I started blogging I made an oath with myself. It went like this...
Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth so help you God?
I do.
So here's the truth.
Long day. I spent the entire morning in bed sleeping. I didn't show my face to the world until after 12:00. It's not that I'd spent much of the night awake taking care of Matthias it's just that the time I'd spent up I was hearing all these voices. I've shared before that I have voices that talk to me. It's my inner voice that haunts me and tortures me. So while I had spent time asleep, the small time awake talking to myself wormed it's way into me and left me quite dark as the sun came up lighting the day.
Gratitude is my feeling this evening for help that I've received to pull me through the day. Kjel and my mom took care of everything; laundry, house cleaned, 4 wild boys and time spent caring for a baby that really wanted to eat but didn't have the option because it's food supply was asleep. I'm SO thankful for the meal that arrived at my home last night from the Taylor family and the meal that arrived this evening from the Smith family.
My outlook is much better tonight. I've quieted the voices (for now) and I'm taking a step back to look at the picture with a better perspective. I only have to make it 24 hours (fellow 12 steppers will understand).