Sunday night I was in tears thinking about everyone going back to work and school. I begged Kjel to just stay home and let the kids stay home. Why do we need to do things that bring enrichment and added value to our lives? Can't we all just stay home and be bums together?? Guess not.
Now, I'd hate to induce guilt on anyone that's thinking we had a magical holiday of fairies and bliss and that I'm a super mom that loves each second of motherhood. Hello!! I've got a house full of boys. The energy has been unforgiving. They all needed to go back to a schedule.
Silly me just likes it when everyone is at home and we have no schedules and at any moment I can look to someone (Kjel) for help. He insisted that he'd prefer to stay home, especially if we sent the kids back to school, but that his boss would frown upon him not at work doing his job. I gave the rebuttal that we could sell the house and live in a tent and forage for food and we'd have everything we needed in one little room. He laughed and set his alarm so he could rise early enough to catch the van pool.
I tried to stay up late in hopes the next day wouldn't come. I still believe that if I don't fall asleep the next day can't come. Eventually, I found myself tired and snuggled in my covers and begged for Monday to be okay. Please let the day be okay even though it will just be me and little guy.
I don't know why the transition back to school is always so difficult for me. When the kids start back from Summer break it nearly sends me over the edge. A few years back there were days when I was so anxiety ridden that I actually kept them home from school even though keeping them home only made for long hard days.
But, this post is about survival. See I made it through today and it was a wonderful day. Matthias and I had a glorious day at home and it was no big deal to sit in calm and quiet. Kjel was right just like he is every time I fuss about everyone leaving me. The day was great. I knew he'd be right that's why I finally put my head on my pillow. I trusted that it would play out like the many times in the past and all would be well. All is well.